Saturday, May 10, 2008

Permissive Will.

Permissive Will.

* doing things even if it's not yet time.

* doing them thinking it's God and Life's way of showing everything to us.

* but the truth is_ we're making it...doing it on "our time".

Yesterday evening till wee hours in the morning, I had a friendly chat, I must say a good one with a sister. We are traversing the road of perception and self- determination when the thing about permissive will came up.

According to my friend, a mate of hers told her about it. That sometimes people tend to do things, make it feel as if fate brought it upon themselves to relish...where in fact, they're nothing but self- inflicted injuries in the making. Ouch!

Yes, folks. I know, the truth hurts. It's nothing but denial plastered all over like a bad, tainted kind of freakish-looking wall paper,hehe. Yup, that's the main thing really. Ouch again!

Let me give you an example:

E.g. Let's're sleeping in a room with only one window. You have managed to keep it close for months knowing that this bratty little sis of yours normally has the habit of pretending she's one superhero trying to climb anything unstable,hazardous etc. Beyond the window stood a lovely apple tree, already bearing these red,plump, appetite inducing produce which your sister does not only love but crave for. You told her it's better to wait for Dad picking some come Sunday than try to get it by herself...she pretends to have listened and walked out on you one day. So, you thought all else's settled but wait...

Sunday came. And the brat anxiously waited...she knew daddy will still get some but she can't pull herself together much longer...she decided to go for it and climb. As daddy turned his back, the sister run her way to your room, opened the window and tried to reach for the branch nearby. Guess what happened next? There goes she...bearing a number of ugly bruises plus a broken rib. Were the apples worth the risk? NO.

Permissive Will teaches us to respect time for its being and events for their happening.
We badly want to happen.
We believe it's meant to be there for us to climb, reach or get.
We take the risk of seeing what our eyes only want to see...denying that somewhere lurks danger.

There are principles, I know and I believe in them too.
There are people and things worth fighting for...that's also true.
But if these things are voicing out a tinge of gray when it's supposed to be white...go and ask yourselves? Do you really in really that God's giving it to you? Can you honestly say that whatever risk your taking isn't a fruit of one's defiance to fulfill selfishness?

For God even life brings you whatever it is that is necessary. You are rewarded with blessings regardless of how such we're brought into your life. You need not force them to happen...

Unless you wanted a couple of nasty-looking bruises, too? A broken rib perhaps?
I don't think so.

Thursday, May 8, 2008

what if...

"What if someone you know turns out to be someone you knew"?

I think it'll be too sad...
But again, life is unpredictably sound and anything can happen.

But how do we get to know them again?
How do we get ourselves from re finding someone who turned his back on us at one point?
Are second chances worth- giving?

I don't know really. Maybe...
Our feelings often lead us to thinking that chances must be given to anyone. For at the back of our feeble minds, we're thinking why not? We can still go on living even if we thought giving chances isn't worth the dime? There'll always be hanging questions prompting us to give answers to, even if it means hurt or even lies.

It's true that people around us play a significant part. If you're eccentric, some covert-loving individual, you can maybe go on alone. But if you are the ever unpredictable guy/gal, some people-loving, accepting, benign person, then you are ready for the worst type of beating ever- giving chances which could mean disappointment and moving on.

I guess, there is nothing wrong about giving chances.
Even if the person you had given it to doesn't necessarily return a good favor.
For what if such person really needs the chance?
What if the chance he/she's asking means a start he badly wants?

Think about it.

Happy Reading!!!

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

this is one of those days....

Last night, I was feeling so much better...but now, it seems that I've taken the plunge a bit too early. This passes as one of those days wherein you can't exactly pinpoint sadness and its source. It's like I'm too lazy to do anything; wanted to rest but my mind keeps on battling against it. Aaaaaah! I don't know what's wrong with me!?

But then I am always struggling to survive whatever thing that bothers me this much. As far as I remember, every thing is fine except a couple of loopholes,here and there, but who doesn't have any?

I had a fateful meeting with someone who brings either bliss or pain. Yeah...that's right, some person who stirred in me both happiness and disgust. Who made me feel the extremes, nothing in between.

I thought I was done with the thinking but showing up just like that? Got to say, I was never prepared.
But then again...I know that after this, I'll be fine.
I'm too fly to be depressed ( remember Ne-yo,hehe).
I just hated this feeling for I'm supposed to be stronger now.

these I part of a higher plan...a test of endurance.
With me either giving in or not.
I will not. Never will I give in.

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

In seeing old friends...

Last May 3, I went out swimming with grade school friends. It's a get together, hoping many would come but a raring number showed up,hehe. The eager ones, I must say.

It's nice talking of those days, our teachers, how we were with each other. It's a good feeling knowing that a part of us remains young and upbeat, that years did not take away the genuineness of things.

We grew and become Some had gone having families and rearing children. Some had stayed single but happy. None of which changed the fact that hanging out with each other makes us all glad. For a few hours from night till 4 am...we felt how memories stay no matter what.

If there is a particular reason which made me even happier was seeing my good friend...Jocelyn.
Back then, we were like a trio- I, Jocelyn and Ann Cheryl. We do things together. Eat lunch and plan things together. We're like the Yayas' and the Sisters. We're somewhat inseparable and up to now, Jocelyn remembers, how cool is that? :)

She showed me a picture of her daughter. And meeting her husband, seeing how they are towards each other...I see that she is clearly happy and blessed. She works as a teacher and honestly, I never imagined her being one...ooops! Sorry :)

With that being said...we plan for another outing next year. We think of doing something every year, for that matter. And I will always look forward seeing them all again and again.

Friends to me...they're not just anybody.
They're always somebody. They make you see what you you'd been as days went by.

Happy Reading!!!
Ciao!!! :)

Friday, May 2, 2008

Beating Writer's Block

My husband and I purchased this desktop in 2004, thinking of getting connected online...finally! No one really needs it badly but we decided that it would be convenient having one and so we did.

I don't know about him but my first thoughts were like: Yes! I could write, write and write at my pace, thinking not the inconvenience of doing it outside but the power to express myself with just a few clicks and all. So selfishly convenient, don't you think? hehe.

Anyways, I'm the type who loves doing my writing old-style. I keep notes, papers and notebooks where my first creations took refuge, and they pile up and end up in waste cans. Especially when your Mom forgot to ask you first if those were important. So, there they were burnt to extinction...thinking of them now makes me sad ( that? due to I, also being a pack rat,hehe).

Back to the topic, I have adopted certain habits when it comes to writing:
Like...I wanted to have my paper and pen with me...always ready as if I can't have hard copy.
That...I usually write about love, relationships, heartaches and pain, as if I write my best pieces when I'm at my emotional worst,haha!
That...I love doing it mid afternoon...with a mug of coffee on my side. Truly, caffeine fixes my mood.
That...nowadays...I love, no...I'm prompted to write very late due to inconsistent sleep practices.
That...while working on an essay...I would suddenly find my brains prodding me to write about something else...I have a limited attention span and my writing helps me widen it somehow,retain focus even for a while. Thank God!

Actually, the reason why I'm doing this is because I've been battling with writer's block this very time. I have set my plans and hopefully get started on essays I have been dying to submit but failed to do it for weeks now. I don't know...I'm not inspired and I feel a work done half-heartedly is not a good one at all. I'd rather take my time than submit mediocre articles buzzing rejection.

I read somewhere that the only way to beat writer's block is to write.
Even if it's all nonsense, the thing is- you are slowly motivating yourself to write at a much controlled pace...allow yourself to take time until every suitable factor gets back to life.
The motivation...willingness... intensity of emotions, concentration.

I even resorted to rewriting just to overcome procrastination and hopefully the articles will be ready soon!

Happy Reading!

Thursday, May 1, 2008

texting 101

Hi! Each day, I receive a no. of good text messages from friends and family- words or phrases that inspire, encourage, enlighten whatever sense I bear. Since I was unfortunately being tagged as broken hearted( you know who you are,hehe), I did not really take offense but I guess, it's time to change the tone a little...

For starters, let me share with you a couple of good messages I received these last few days...
Let your minds dwell on these beautiful passages...

* "Every experience brings out something good. Good times become good memories, bad memories become good lessons.
You never lose , you only gain from life."

this is from a private school teacher who is also a good friend back grade school days.

* " we may sometimes wonder why friends keep forwarding messages to us. Let me enlighten you: we are all very busy,but still want to keep in touch; we have nothing to say but still want to stay connected; we have something to say but don't know what and how to say it; we want to let you know that you are remembered, important, loved and missed;
So, the next time you get a message from me, don't think of it as just another forwarded text...but rather...I have thought of you today! Take care!

this is from one of the most hardworking people I know...a very good companion back in high school.

* " Sometimes, we realize to change for the better just when the situation got worse...we realize to finally correct our mistakes just when those mistakes have caused irreversible damage... we finally decided to prove ourselves worthy when the person whom you want to prove your worth has already decided that you're not worth it at all...

Most of the lessons are learned when the test is over, that's how ironic life is."

this is from a dutiful daughter and sister...a very good friend who I am glad to spend my recent days...

* "We want nothing but the best. We ask for practically all the good things. Good things come in either small or big packages...but why wait for these to come...if you can make them happen."

this is from me....:)

Happy Reading!!!
Ciao and Tc !!!